Easy

Following your dream is not easy.  I was recently talking with a friend who is pursuing her dream of full time ministry.  It requires her to go back to school.  She thought the process would be easier.  She thought she would enjoy her classes and would actually want to do her assignments.  She thought that if she followed the plan God set for her life, the journey would be easy.  Instead, the path is sometimes boring and a chore.  I can relate.

I, too, have believed that if I pursued my dream, that thing that God created me to do, it would be easy.  I thought I would enjoy all aspect of writing, that the words would flow easily and beautifully, and that I would wake up each day excited about my pursuit.  (I know some of you are laughing as you read this....It sounded much more realistic when it was only in my head!)  Instead, there are days when I don't want to research or write, the words don't flow, and are they anything but beautiful.  On those days, doubt can set in.  Doubt that this is really what God has called me to do. Doubt that I have the ability to do it.  Doubt that what I do has any meaning.   After all, if this was what I was made to do, it should be easy.  But that is a lie.  No one said, especially God, that life or pursuing a dream would be easy.  It takes work, effort, and perseverance.

So the choice before me and anyone else pursuing a dream is whether to believe the lie and quit, or recognize it for what it is and continue pressing on towards the goal.  I choose to press on....

Veteran's Day

I went to a Veteran's Day program at my kids' school.  Truth be told, I only went because my daughter was singing in the choir.  What I experienced was a very moving tribute to our troops, past and present.

It started with a wonderful prayer led by the student body president, followed by the presenting of the flag and the Pledge of Allegiance.  We then sang the Star Spangled Banner along with the choir and band.  I was already getting misty eyed.  Then the flag for each branch of the military was presented.  Veterans and active members of each branch were invited to stand by their respective flags.  We were then able to applaud them for their service.  It was moving to see each one walk to the front.  They each approached with a mixture of pride for their branch and humility for their service.  It was breathtaking to watch.  It brought me to tears. 

Then the speaker began.  She was a retired marine in her mid fifties.  She spoke of the pride that retired and active military members have for their service.  She said many of them wear hats to show when and where they served.  She also spoke of the struggles they encounter when coming home; injuries,  post traumatic stress disorder, joblessness and the like.  She encouraged us to look for veterans and take 2 seconds to say 5 words:  Thank you for your service.  She said those words could bring healing and encouragement.  By the time she was done speaking, we were all ready to start.

The program ended with the Junior ROTC offering a tribute to all our veterans.  At its end, I was doing everything I could not to go into my ugly, snot bubble cry.  It was beautiful and touching.  (And I am recommending Kleenex for next years program!)  I was overcome with gratitude for everyone who has served our country.  It humbles me to know that men and women are willing to sacrifice so much so that I can have the wonderful freedoms that I do living in this country.  So to all of you who have served, are serving, or are part of a military family:  Thank you for you service!

Comfort

I like to be comfortable.  I like wearing comfortable clothes and comfortable shoes.  I like sitting in comfortable chairs wrapped in comfortable blankets.  I like comfortable situations and comfortable conversations.  I find being uncomfortable...uncomfortable.  The problem is that I'm not called to live a comfortable life.  I'm called to live a life of purpose and meaning which means embracing the uncomfortable.  And though I fully believe and feel passionate about living bravely and outside my comfort zone, I often revert to my comfortable ways.  It's an easy place to be; it feels safe and manageable.  The problem about living there is that I am left unsatisfied and unfulfilled.  Yet the pull to stay comfortable is very strong, both internally and externally.

Internally, I think, "Life is good.  Why rock the boat?"  Life seems manageable, under control.  (Or as under control as it can be in our household!)  There's enough activity and unexpected situations to give the illusion of living outside my comfort zone.  But it's not true.  And so after a while, I'm left feeling restless.

Externally, I am told that we all have and like our comfort zones. I take this as permission to stay in my zone.  After all, we all have one; it's normal.  Besides, I'm told, I should do things that feel good or come naturally to me.  I don't need to do things that would cause discomfort.  While I agree that it's good to use my natural gifts and talents, I think I use them as an excuse to justify staying in my comfort zone.  I talk about facing my fears and getting out of my zone, but too often I decide to stick with my zone and just dream of what it would be like to venture out.  But after a while, I'm left feeling restless and unfulfilled.

So how do I embrace the uncomfortable and make it a daily habit?  A lifestyle?  I so wish there was an easy answer!  But I'm learning that it takes time and practice...lots of practice.  The good thing is that God gives me a lot of opportunities.  Some days are great.  I embrace the uncomfortable and live bravely.  Some days I stay in my zone refusing to be moved.  (I generally don't like those days.)  I find that stepping out can be uncomfortable and I second guess myself, thinking I look foolish. I'm discovering, though, that the bad feelings I'm left with when I stay put are not worth the momentary comfort.  So here I go again.....